“And they lived happily ever after”, that’s the often ending of those fancy fairytales. But in reality it goes like this, a girl will meets a boy of her dreams, they will crazy fall in love, they will get married and will never live happily ever after? How will they live happily ever after if they don't have the house of their own? How could they have a happy family if they themselves were not anymore happy of their partners face? In such cases it was said that there is just no love, whether they love each other. Most such cases are of obsession by one or the other and in a few rare cases of both being obsessed with each other.
It was said that many people are often mistaken for love because people rationalize the crazy feelings they are having. They assume that it must be love if the other person is always on their mind. According to studies, the relationship of love has different dimensions, and the worst of it is when you mistake obsession for love. The people who are obsessed with their feelings tend to consider their obsession towards their object of desire as their love. They would rather attempt at tying down the other person instead of understanding their emotions and needs.
It was said that many people are often mistaken for love because people rationalize the crazy feelings they are having. They assume that it must be love if the other person is always on their mind. According to studies, the relationship of love has different dimensions, and the worst of it is when you mistake obsession for love. The people who are obsessed with their feelings tend to consider their obsession towards their object of desire as their love. They would rather attempt at tying down the other person instead of understanding their emotions and needs.
People who are obsessed often lose their self with who they are as an individual resulting to brutal behavior where the obsessed person grows more and more dependent on the other person to strengthen their self.
Unrequited love or the love that is not returned back can lead to obsession, being in love with a person who doesn’t seem to share the same feelings can be very frustrating and heartbreaking on the other hand you are still blind in reality. If you're in the middle of an unrequited love obsession it's important to understand that your situation does not have to be hopeless. There are ways to influence the other person, but you have to learn how human nature works and use this knowledge to your advantage. Some adults expresses obsession in terms of erotic love, which is more dangerous. The obsessed one either destroys oneself or destroys the object of obsession. He may go to any extent to get the object of his desire and may turn violent if the subject is taken away. Some reports said that teens often commit suicide after being turned down. The others become violent, hurting and blackmailing their interest.
Although those who are obsessed with love offers their time and self just to get and have their desired person it was never a relationship of a mutual person caring each other. It was a relationship of power, a display of brutishness and a game of ego. As Scott Peck wrote in his inspirational book The Road Less Travelled (Arrow New-Age).
“Love is not a feeling. Love is an action, an activity... Genuine love implies commitment and the exercise of wisdom... love as the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth... true love is an act of will that often transcends ephemeral feelings of love or cathexis, it is correct to say, 'Love is as love does'”. He also said that love is a mysterious thing even in the best of times. He identifies some of the myths of `falling in love' and romantic love that our culture through various means idealizes, leading to great dissatisfaction when we do not achieve the desired feelings or situations. Peck makes the assertion that love is not really a feeling, but rather an action or activity that involves a lot of risk-taking, of risk of independence, of commitment, of confrontation, and of loss. True love requires discipline and recognition of the needs of the self and others to live happily ever after.
Although those who are obsessed with love offers their time and self just to get and have their desired person it was never a relationship of a mutual person caring each other. It was a relationship of power, a display of brutishness and a game of ego. As Scott Peck wrote in his inspirational book The Road Less Travelled (Arrow New-Age).
“Love is not a feeling. Love is an action, an activity... Genuine love implies commitment and the exercise of wisdom... love as the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth... true love is an act of will that often transcends ephemeral feelings of love or cathexis, it is correct to say, 'Love is as love does'”. He also said that love is a mysterious thing even in the best of times. He identifies some of the myths of `falling in love' and romantic love that our culture through various means idealizes, leading to great dissatisfaction when we do not achieve the desired feelings or situations. Peck makes the assertion that love is not really a feeling, but rather an action or activity that involves a lot of risk-taking, of risk of independence, of commitment, of confrontation, and of loss. True love requires discipline and recognition of the needs of the self and others to live happily ever after.
